Miss Manners: When you use a speaker phone during our business call, I get a headache

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I work in an office where my duties include taking phone calls from customers. Over the last couple of years, I have noticed that more and more people are using speakerphone to conduct calls with us.

For some people, this is a very useful tool. For example, for the last few months my aunt was alive, she didn’t have the strength to hold a phone anymore. But for most people, the speakerphone is a convenience rather than a necessity.

The problem that my co-workers and I experience is that sound is amplified a great deal when using a speakerphone. Someone setting a pan on the counter sounds like someone slamming a pan down instead. A dog walking into a room sounds like a herd of elephants. A door being closed sounds like it is being slammed.

This background noise often makes conversation difficult: It drowns out the person we are speaking to, and we often have to repeat ourselves or ask them to repeat themselves. Also, a full day of repeated calls like this will often give us headaches.

Do you have a humorous response to someone using a speakerphone to indicate that it is interfering with our ability to conduct business?

GENTLE READER: You did not mention your line of work, but “May I interest you in some headphones?” comes to mind.

In lieu of that, Miss Manners suggests you tell your customers conspiratorially that they may want to locate a pair so that they are not overheard by others. Although they may then be distracted by wondering what about your conversation is secret.

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(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)