Pieces of Us: The real, bonding power of entertainment

WICHITA, Kan. (KWCH) – I’ve always heard that immersing yourself in a TV series, movie franchise or new album is an “escape from reality,” and I hate how long it took for me to realize that’s nonsense.

What’s the first thing you do after you’ve binge-watched an awesome Netflix show?

Maybe you run to your phone and leave a review, hoping to engage total strangers in a frenzied conversation about the characters, the story lines or that crazy ending. Maybe you just browse the reviews of others, looking for opinions that match your own so you can feel great about dedicating hours of your life to television.

Or, most likely, you jump on social media and let everyone you know or sort of know that your life just changed in 11 hours. You might go a bit deeper with a few of your close friends. Can you believe what happened in Episode 7?

Whatever your first move is, it’s important to you that others share your opinion. Admit it, it is.

And that’s totally normal. We all want to be part of a community, somewhere we feel we belong. We want to be involved in something bigger than us. There’s nothing escapist about that.

That zombie-alien superhero mutant werewolf accountant-turned-assassin TV show might be the furthest thing from reality. But the emotions we feel during and after watching it are as genuine as it gets.

That’s the sole reason entertainment exists, to elicit strong feelings, opinions and even visceral reactions. There’s nothing more real than what we feel.

That whole “escape from reality” is inherently defeatist. It implies that reality is bad. That there’s nothing to this life but the mundane, tedious, monotonous and uninspiring. Or, if you want a better word — my mom used to say “humdrum.” What a great word.

Why can’t reality be fun, enthusiastic, exciting, unpredictable? The numbers you put into your data entry machine are no more real or inauthentic than the zombie-alien werewolf. Everything is, in fact, made up. Reality becomes more bearable the moment we realize that.

I had a friend, Kevin, with whom I shared a deep love of great music. Nothing genre-specific — if it was good, we liked it. We had an unofficial list of “perfect songs” that we never wrote down but could somehow always keep track of. We added to it whenever we felt inspired to. I claimed that you couldn’t say you like music if you didn’t like “Amie” by Pure Prairie League, and Kevin loved Journey, Jimmy Buffett and the rapper Lloyd Banks.

Kevin died about a year ago — that’s when reality turns harsh. And it hurt bad because he was only 34. And it hurt bad not because we hung out a lot or shared a long history together. We didn’t. But we had a connection based on music. He sent me songs all the time that he wanted me to hear, and too many times I didn’t listen to them.

But a lot of times I did, and those songs helped me understand him. That’s all any of us want, really, is to be understood. And for many of us, it’s impossible to be understood if you don’t know our favorite TV show, movie or band. Much of my identity, for better or worse, is tied to my love for the Eagles — the band — and my dedication to seeing them live as many times as possible.

Las Vegas. The Sphere. Next weekend. Eagles concerts No. 55 and 56. Can’t wait.

So, next time you hear that something you love is an “escape from reality,” don’t buy into it. What’s your reality? If it’s that you’ve watched every episode of Stranger Things 17 times, know all the words to Cher’s fourth album or can list all of the Avengers villains off the top of your head, embrace it. And make sure others embrace it, too.

Your taste in entertainment is a way to be known, a way to share the enjoyable parts of life with others and to fit in. To find your place in the world.

And it’s real. There’s no escaping that.

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