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‘Oh I couldn’t. Wouldn’t dream of it. What now? I Couldn’t get away with it’.
How many times in a week do we slam on the What’s Possible breaks and decide not to try something based on the assumption that it wouldn’t be right?
How often do we think ‘Oh that looks fun, isn’t that lovely? But it’s not right for me’ , when what we mean is it’s not suitable for a fifty-plus woman?
Well, big mistake. Huge. The day you stop trying the new and unexpected is the day you start to look every inch your age.
What we look best in will change over time, this we all know, and it pays to keep an eye on what you suit and what’s no longer doing you any favours.
But too much erring on the side of caution is the enemy of style and sticking only with what you know is a sure route to looking dull and much the same year after year.
And there’s another good reason to keep an open mind: the older you get (surprisingly enough), the more a bit of risk taking pays off.
A 25 year old looks fine in extra wide flares, but a fifty-plus woman looks interesting and bold and scores extra style points for carrying off the look of the season and not settling for safe.
It’s the clothes you didn’t think you could wear that deliver the most, when it turns out you definitely can.
I’m not saying everyone should rush out and buy a pair of silver leather trousers, but, if there’s something you’re steering clear of simply because you think it isn’t for people your age – you love it and would happily step outside a changing room wearing it – give it a try.
You might surprise yourself.
NB: One helpful rule when branching out into I Didn’t Know I Could (IDKIC) territory: don’t expose parts of your body that you wouldn’t have 20 years ago. Here are the IDKIC risks to take this season..
A cape
In general capes are either cute on the young and cool, or a bit widowy.
The exception, and the cape you can happily carry off in midlife and beyond, is waist length, to wear in the evening over a dress or wide velvet trousers.
The new style that ticks the cool and wearable box is a cape cardigan.
This is one of those items you can’t see the point of until you try it on and then it makes you feel chic and original.
John Lewis‘s style (£55) comes with flat, beaten silver buttons which give it a Danish designer feel (minimal but daring).
You can wear it over a slim polo neck, long-sleeved T shirt or plain shirt with trousers or jeans, heels or flats, and add a hood (£25) if you want to make it more of a jacket.
Still a ‘no’: long black wool capes; you’ll look like an extra in Call the Midwife.
An OTT fur coat
There’s no hard and fast rule when it comes to fake fur, but you can’t go wrong if you buy something that looks expensive, feels expensive and has an element of ‘Ooh… Hello’ about it.
A good place to start is the M&S X Sienna Miller black faux fur jacket with a shawl collar (£79, marksandspencer.com) a classic glamourfier you’ll be wearing forever.
Or opt for this brown fur by Reserved (£89.99, reserved.com)
Still a ‘no’: candy colours
A waistcoat
We never thought we were wearing waistcoats again, but then… things change, including the way you wear them.
This season’s batch are slightly roomy and made to be worn like your favourite tank top, with wide leg trousers – although they also look great as part of a suit.
Try Anyday’s navy asymetric waistcoat (£39, johnlewis.com) and navy wide-leg trousers (£45) or, my favourite, the black longline, hip-covering waistcoat (£45).
Or choose Monsoon’s blue pinstripe waistcoat (£55) and pair it with their wide leg matching trousers (£69).
Those with good arms can wear nothing underneath or a soft shirt with a bit of volume to the sleeves.
Still a ‘no’: tight waistcoats and halternecks.
A Studio 54 trouser suit
A black tuxedo gets harder to pull off with age – too severe and not quite special enough.
These are the years when we need to ramp up the bling, or the colour, or just confound expectations a bit.
The answer is the Studio 54 trouser suit. It could be a white wool blend double-breasted jacket – another look from the M&S X Sienna Miller collection (£125) – with the matching wide-leg flat front trousers (£79) plus the waistcoat (£69) too if you like.
The combination is snappy, Savile Row and sexy and means you don’t need to think about what goes with it.
This is a look that’s timeless, ageless and a bit daring (ivory in winter), so no reason not to join in if you like a party trouser suit.
Still a ‘no’: sequin trouser suit
A kilt
A kilt is top of the list of things you instinctively avoid post your twenties and if you’re talking about a mini tartan kilt that’s a good rule to stick to.
But there’s another type of kilt, new for autumn, that’s plain wool and finishes low on the calf so it has the DNA of a serious grown up skirt, with a bit of highland attitude- so try the Boyd Kilt from Plumo (£249, Plumo.com) to get the look.
Jaeger for Marks & Spencer did a beautiful midaxi kilt that sold out almost immediately, though Autograph’s dark slate kilt (£99) is still available.
Wear with a shirt or cropped sweater and boots – and make the boots modern. A kitten heel, pointed toe knee-high style in crackle leather would be just the right blend of feminine but spiky.
Still a ‘no’: mini kilts
Leather trousers
Back when leather trousers automatically meant tight rock n’ roll leather trousers cut like five-pocket jeans, they were not for everyone and barely anyone over 50 (Chrissie Hynde excepted).
These days leather trousers are now just another type of smart trouser and 100 per cent more accessible.
For a start they’re mostly pleather (lighter, softer, much cheaper) and the best are tailored like your favourite black wool, man’s cut pants, not skinny jeans.
Wear with a velvet jacket and a lace trimmed slip top in the evening or a funnel neck sweater in the day.
Still a ‘no’: leather leggings
Wideleg leather-effect trousers from Mango (£49.99) and Leather-effect elastic waist trousers (£55.99, shop.mango.com)
A baseball jacket
Last had one of these in 1980? Yes we know, but that was turquoise and red with vinyl sleeves, whereas this is cream faux shearling from M&S (£69) and looks like something Vogue Editor Anna Wintour might have in her wardrobe.
You can wear this one with all the winter whites – a turtle neck and A line skirt – or all the browns, blue denim or black.
The key to keeping a baseball jacket grown-up appropriate is a luxurious look and feel and what you wear it with.
Keep it smart and pair it with a skirt.
Still a ‘no’: a leather bomber.
A black lace slip dress
What? Like the ones Kate Moss was wearing in the Nineties? Well, yes, in spirit, but this slip dress (£75, johnlewis.com) is long, instead of spaghetti straps it has a V lace-trimmed neckline, front and back, and now you might wear it with a little fur jacket over the top and flats not trainers.
We’re always advising against black but providing you dress it up and don’t stint on the party hair and make-up this is another ageless look.
Still a ‘no’: ivory or pastel slips.
Ballet pumps
I still can’t see a grown up woman in Mary Janes, but ballet flats peeking out under wide leg trousers look smart providing they’re not too flimsy.
Dune’s cherry red ballet pumps (£52, dunelondon.com) or M&S’s silver leather, pointed pumps (£39.50) are a good place to start.
Again you might have to cast your mind way back to recall the last time you wore silver pumps but these are great for elevating everything from your long slip dress to trousers.
Still a No: Mary Janes
