I lost a bet to a sandbagger. Did I have to pay? The Etiquetteist weighs in

Aaron from San Diego writes: Last week, I got paired with a single at my local course. As we were limbering up by the 1st tee, he asked if I wanted to play a friendly match. He said he was “about a 7,” which is my handicap index, so I figured, OK. A few holes in, though, it was pretty clear this guy was much better than he said he was. He bombed it about 280 off the tee. I don’t think he missed a fairway, and he could putt. Bottom line: I got crushed. Our match wasn’t all that big — $10 a side — but this guy had obviously lied to me. I paid him, but could I have gotten away with calling off the bet?

Dear Aaron:

Ah, golf, the great game of honor. Except when it isn’t. Never mind what we’re often told. There is nothing inherently “honorable” about propping a ball on a peg in the ground. Enjoying a great pastime does not in itself make you an honest person. We golfers are just people. And while most of us follow the rules, some of us don’t. Any claims to the contrary — that playing the game is somehow proof of noble character — makes the Etiquetteist’s eyes roll back involuntarily in his head.

Bernie Madoff was a golfer. ‘Nuff said.

How to spot a hustler is another matter. One school of thought holds that you should never wager against a stranger with a worn-out spot on the toe of his or her trail shoe, a telltale sign, the thinking goes, of a pro-caliber move. The Etiquetteist has a simpler rule: never bet against anyone named Lee Trevino, or anyone who says that they’re “about a 7.”

Really, though, there’s know way of knowing.

All we can do is play the game with integrity and hope that others do the same.

Which brings us to your question. Based on your description, it sounds like you got sandbagged, though we can’t be certain. What we can say for sure is that a bet is a bet. No one forced you to make it. Reneging on it would have put you in the wrong. As much it as it must have stung to open your wallet to a guy who likely fooled you, it would have cost you more not to pay him. You would have broken your word, and your word is surely worth more than $30. Chalk it up to a (relatively) inexpensive lesson learned.