I used to hate when people brought their kids to happy hour. Now that I’m a parent, I do it all the time.

Pre-kids, I believed kids should stay home

I used to be in the camp that kids should stay home and that bars should just be for adults. I’ll admit that pre-kids there were times I’d even shoot an evil glance at a parent or a kid in a bar, or roll my eyes when I’d have to sit next to a table that had kids. I thought parents who took kids to bars were irresponsible.

My perspective changed after I had kids of my own, and now I’m firmly of the opinion that parents should feel free like they can take their kids to a bar and not be worried about how they’ll be perceived. I lacked empathy for the challenges parents face everyday and understanding that parents aren’t trying to ruin someone’s experience by taking their kids to a bar. They’re just trying to get a break.

When I just want to be out for a little bit, a babysitter doesn’t make sense

Babysitters are expensive. In our area the rates for two kids range from $18-$25 an hour. If my husband and I just want to grab a couple of drinks, getting a babysitter would likely double the cost of the outing, which really deflates the happiness from happy hour.

I also don’t want to have to go through the effort of finding a babysitter just to leave the house for an hour or so. That doesn’t feel like a productive use of my time, as it typically takes calling around to a few people to find someone who is available. If I’m going to add that work to my plate, I’d like it to be for a longer outing. It also doesn’t feel fair to the babysitter to only be somewhere for a short amount of time.

I try to pick spots where my kids will disrupt patrons the least

Even though I support parents taking kids to bars, I do think that parents should consider which spots will be better for kids. Right now my kids aren’t great at sitting still so I know they need some space to move around. I also know that my kids sometimes cry or get loud. Because of that, I’m not taking them to intimate cocktail bars.

I gravitate to outdoor locations or large indoor breweries where sound is more likely to disperse. These spots usually lend themselves to people moving around more which means I don’t feel bad when my kids move around, too.

I get frustrated when people are quick to blame kids for being disruptive at a bar. Adults can get quite rowdy, too, and having a table of obnoxiously loud adults is just as bothersome as a little kid having a tantrum. I would argue that typically the tantrum is shorter lived, as well.

Taking our kids to happy hour is a way for us to get a change of scenery and be social without having the struggle of finding a babysitter. Parents need a break, too, and it isn’t always feasible to go out without kids.