I’ve planned weddings on mountains and seen million-dollar gowns, but that’s not what young couples are spending more on

• Lelian Chew is the founder of The Atelier & Co, a Singapore-based luxury wedding planning company.
• She has handled luxury weddings with extravagant destinations and million-dollar gowns.
• Chew said that more young Asian couples are spending on traditions to honor their cultural roots.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Lelian Chew, a luxury wedding planner in Asia. It has been edited for length and clarity.

I launched my events planning business, The Atelier & Co, in 2013, planning luxury events and weddings for some of the biggest families in Asia.

As the scale of our weddings grew, they became more than just about the bride and groom, but also about the entire family and their social circles.

It’s almost like marrying two conglomerates. We only get one shot at perfecting it, and the stakes are incredibly high.

Transforming spaces

Many think that when planning million-dollar weddings, the expenses are all about luxury items like gowns or over-the-top decorations, although we do get those occasionally.

For example, we once planned a wedding in which a bride wore a gown that cost over a million dollars. The dress was encrusted with jewels, making it akin to a piece of jewelry.

However, the decorations that go into elevating the space and the experience take up a large part of the budget.

Harper’s Bazaar once described our weddings as “cinematic,” which I think is an apt description because when our guests walk into the venue, we want to ensure they feel like they’ve entered another world.

This requires meticulous attention to detail, from floral arrangements to the color of the decorations that match the couple’s vision.

The logistical challenges and costs can mount quickly for destination weddings on remote islands. We once planned a wedding in the Maldives and had to fly or ship all our logistics, from furniture to cranes.

We also once had a Coachella-type party at the Jade Dragon Snow Mountain in Yunnan, China, where we had to fly all our guests in and build tents in the middle of a snowcapped mountaintop.

Entertainment is another key expense. It’s not uncommon for clients to request a performance from world-renowned artists, like in the recent Ambani wedding. Whether it’s a singer, a band, or even a magician, these acts can cost up a significant sum for just a few hours of entertainment.

Satisfying personal tastes

Then there are food and beverage costs, which can vary greatly depending on the client. Not every wealthy family wants to serve the most expensive wines in the world. For some, it’s about sentimental value.

I’ve had clients who preferred to fly in chefs from their favorite restaurant or home country to prepare a familiar meal rather than going for extravagance.

We’ve also helped a client — a wine aficionado — locate and purchase a vineyard so he could serve wine with his own label at the wedding.

When we get uncommon requests like this, it’s important that we don’t flinch and help our clients however we can.

Younger generation’s focus

Multiple generations are also involved, each with their own expectations for the wedding day. For the older generation, upholding traditions is essential.

For example, some traditional Chinese weddings have six different tea ceremonies to honor the family’s elders.

On the other hand, the younger generation is more focused on creating intimate, personalized experiences.

Many of my clients opt for multiple events — a massive celebration at home to honor family traditions, followed by a smaller, more intimate destination wedding for their close friends and loved ones.

In recent years, I’ve noticed a shift in Asian weddings whereby younger generations emphasize upholding traditions in their weddings.

It’s no longer just about the Western-style white gown and vow exchanges. Couples incorporate traditional touches, unique to their own cultural roots, into the grand event.

For example, it’s common for the bride to have several wardrobe changes besides the standard white gown. For different events, she might wear other gowns reflective of her culture.

It’s been inspiring to see this because it differentiates the weddings we do here in Asia from those happening worldwide.

We’ve had the opportunity to incorporate cultural aspects into weddings, from traditional Indian ceremonies to Moroccan and Bangladeshi elements, making these events stand out and celebrate the rich traditions of Asia.

Many would flock to Lake Como or France for destination weddings, but I’ve always believed that choosing a location tied to one’s culture makes the experience even more special.

For example, the wedding we planned on the top of the Snow Jade Dragon Mountain in China was for a bride with deep cultural ties to the region. We involved local villagers in preparing a traditional feast, creating handmade furniture, and performing local songs, making the event beautiful, deeply meaningful, and authentic to the bride’s heritage.

Do you have a story to share about working around high-net-worth individuals? Email this reporter at lwee@insider.com.