Starmer on your soles and Thatcher on your teacup: we vote for the best, worst and weirdest election merch

You may have snapped up a Renaissance tour T-shirt when you went to see Beyoncé or display your loyalty to your local coffee shop by carrying around its branded reusable cup. But have you thought about buying a memento of the 2024 general election?

Political parties are betting on it (not just the Conservatives this time) as they continue to churn out election merch right up to polling day. The somewhat eclectic offerings are far from the days of a simple satin rosette or bumper sticker.

On Monday, the Tories restocked their £16.99 Keir Starmer flip-flops. “Labour has a ‘liable to change’ leader who will flip his position if the politics flop to suit him”, reads the blurb. Launched at their party conference last October, perhaps Rishi Sunak and co hoped that voters might wear them to polling stations on Thursday. Other reported bestsellers on the site include A Dangerous Brew mug featuring a caricature of Angela Rayner and Starmer and a £2,094 plastic red piggy bank – a nod to the amount that they claim Starmer will increase taxes by (it is now out of stock).

In a way that recalls parties’ activities on the campaign trail, there’s plenty of self-promotion among the slagging off. . One has to wonder if Sunak was in charge of the Tories’ pop art-style coasters featuring images of its “most iconic leaders”, including Benjamin Disraeli, Winston Churchill, Margaret Thatcher and – you guessed it – Sunak himself. There’s also a “the lady’s not for turning” mug and a Kendall Roy-esque navy baseball cap featuring some subtle Conservative iconography, if there can be such a thing as a subtle Tory, and an umbrella featuring a quote from Churchill: “One always measures friendships by how they show up in bad weather.” We’re guessing this was likely released prior to Sunak’s decision to call an election standing uncovered and alone in the rain.

Labour is offering all grownup merch, not satirical gimmicks. There’s Totes Labour cloth bags and a stable-looking stoneware mug, while T-shirts and sweatshirts come in oversized streetwear-inspired fits and football-esque giant scarves feature a graphic text spin on its Change slogan. While their Sparkle With Starmer T-shirt is long gone, a statement Vote Labour Perspex red necklace – regularly seen on Angela Rayner – can be bought from the independent jewellery brand Tatty Devine.

The Green party’s offering is minimal, which seems on brand. There’s a Vote Green mug and some meme-worthy “brat” green posters. For T-shirts and the like, look to the Greens’ collab with Teemill, an Isle of Wight-based circular economy platform that prints to demand and takes back used and unwanted T-shirts to turn them into new ones. Reform, meanwhile, naturally doesn’t conform with traditional merchandise offerings, instead flogging branded hard hats and high-vis vests. Elsewhere, the Women’s Equality Party is hoping for its own viral moment with its Vote Labia–emblazoned baseball caps, while it seems the Animal Welfare Party missed an opportunity by selling T-shirts for adults but not jackets for dogs.

But the rest of the internet is where the real clickbait merch is. Etsy is awash with unofficial merch spanning everything from Tory wipeout bingo games to mugs featuring that image of Nigel Farage getting pelted with a banana milkshake. One of the site’s bestsellers are Taylor Swift-style friendship bracelets spelling out “Fuck the Tories”. Happy voting.

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